[youtube width=”900″ height=”506″]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_sLv_BC4iWs[/youtube]
Video by Amber Dupree
LAURA’S STORY
Laura Harper was born and raised in Basic City, Mississippi to a strict Southern Baptist family, the oldest of four girls. At least one member of her family has served in the military during every US conflict since the Revolutionary War and in both the Union and Confederate Armies during the Civil War. As Laura puts it, “It was just something in the family DNA”.
Laura’s father served in the military for 40 years, starting with Air Force enlistment in 1968 and deploying to Vietnam at the very height of that conflict. He continued serving with the Mississippi Air National Guard through deployments to Afghanistan. Once while traveling back from her first deployment to Iraq, through Germany, Laura ran into her Dad as he was on his way to Afghanistan.
“Although my father had always insisted that his daughters get an education instead, he was thrilled when I joined the military. I did both,” Laura remembers with a smile.
Laura did get her education first and not in a shy way; a BS in Psychology and a BA in Foreign Languages from Mississippi State University and a Master’s Degree in Criminology from Sam Houston State University in Texas set her on her path. She might have continued with a civilian life had it not been for the tragic events of September 11th, 2001.
“We were watching television and I turned to my best friend and told her…if these are foreign attacks, I am joining the military.” And indeed she did. In 2005, at the age of 26, Laura enlisted in the Air Force as an Airman First Class and trained to be an “Airborne Cryptologic Linguist”.
Basic training at Lackland Air Force Base in San Antonio followed, along with sixteen grueling months of intensely immersive Arabic language instruction. She came out of this specialized training as a highly valued American soldier, fluent in Arabic with a top-secret security clearance.
Laura’s first deployment was to Qatar, a small peninsula off the coast of Saudi Arabia where she served in support of “Operation Enduring Freedom” and flew missions from Qatar to Afghanistan on a daily basis. Her second deployment was to Tikrit, in Iraq, where she served with the 1st battalion 75th Ranger Regiment as an Arabic linguist and a “special operator” for the Joint Special Operations Command. She was one of the first women ever to work for the military in that capacity.
Laura’s third and final deployment was once again to Iraq but this time she went to Balad and worked with the Special and Conventional Forces of all of the military branches as a Special Operator. She also conducted “in theater” training as a Non-Commission Officer in Charge (NCOIC) and a Staff Sergeant. But by now, the war and the intense duration of service had taken its toll on her both physically and mentally. Her stint was over. And she was ready to go home.
In December of 2009, Laura left military service and decided against re-enlisting…and not just because she was tired of war.
At sixteen years old, Laura suspected she was gay but kept it to herself because of her deeply felt commitment to her Southern Baptist faith and her very conservative family. She hoped those feelings she could not share would just go away.
Initially… being in the military, she believed, protected her from anyone suspecting she was a lesbian…maybe even herself. But just two days after completing her basic training, she began her first relationship with another woman, also in the military. It was already becoming very clear that those feelings would never go away. But now it was not about hiding from herself but keeping her relationship secret from the military, her friends and her family. Everyone.
It didn’t take too long for their relationship to be discovered by her superiors. But Laura was a good, valuable soldier and her Master Sergeant suggested that she finish her training as quickly as possible, get to another base and hopefully it wouldn’t follow her. Luckily, that is exactly what happened. At their next base, she and her girlfriend actually became official military roommates.
“The military had already invested so much in me. If I hadn’t been such a good a linguist and such a good airman…it could have been totally different. I was so lucky.”
Laura continued her relationship with her girlfriend for the entirety of her military service yet they were constantly under the demoralizing threat of new discovery by less tolerant superiors and wearied by the emotional drain of secrecy . When it came time for her original terms of enlistment to conclude, she opted out of re-enlistment.
“I can’t continue living a life like this. I can’t.”
Somewhat ironically, Laura and her girlfriend broke up shortly after their military service was over. Searching for solace, solitude and a gradual entry back into civilian society, Laura decided to “walk off the war” and solo hike the Appalachian Trail. In the Spring of 2010, as the snow broke in the mountains of Georgia, she hit the trail alone and walked from Georgia all the way to Maine in 5 ½ months. There she found another type of brotherhood amongst fellow hikers who helped each other out in the spirit of camaraderie, mutual challenge and shared experience.
“Having seen the worst of humanity….to be in a position now where I have to trust other people…and seeing their goodness. It was the best therapy ever.”
Just before leaving for the Trail, Laura met her future wife, Judy, a doctor, at a gym while physically preparing for the trip. They kept touch while Laura was on the trail and Judy even bought a guidebook to track Laura’s progress. They happily reunited after Laura returned invigorated by her experience and in high spirits.
Two years later, in New York City, Laura proposed and they were married in July of 2012. Both Laura and Judy had always found faith so important to their lives and they soon discovered a progressive and accepting religious community in the Presbyterian Church. Laura has been ordained as a Deacon. There together as a married couple, they have found both new family and continued faith.
Some years before, in between deployments to Iraq, Laura had decided to come out to her Southern Baptist parents. It did not go well. To this day, they remain estranged. Fortunately, Laura remains in contact with one of her sisters.
Even though now out of the military, Laura wanted to continue to serve her country. She used her GI Bill to get another Master’s Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling at Gannon University in Erie, PA and was the first openly gay lesbian ever in the program. Having seen first-hand the pain and savagery of war, Laura decided to choose a career where she could counsel veterans, particularly those that have seen combat and suffered emotional trauma.
Laura and Judy moved to Columbus in early 2014 to further their respective careers. Laura now serves as a Readjustment Counseling Therapist at Columbus Vet Center in the Short North.
“Five years ago I was serving under DADT,” Laura remembers. “…now I’m married, working for the Veterans Administration and running an LGBT Veterans Support group. Unimaginable just a short time ago. Unimaginable… and so exciting.”
